Yeah so, it’s almost a shame how tragically cool I look wearing this water belt BECAUSE I HATE IT.
Actually, no. Strike that. I love it. I really do. It didn’t do any of the things I feared it would, like rub, chafe or bounce.
Having said that, I will now describe to you why I will never wear it running again.
I start out okay. La la la. I’m running. I’m running. This is different, but it’s okay.
After about half a mile, I develop a stitch in my side from sucking in my gut to compensate for the belly-accentuating belt strapped around my midsection. I exhale.
Round about .75 I pull the bottle out of the holster in a fashion that I can only hope is Clint Eastwoodian. I stop (STOP!) to put it back in.
At around 1.25 I begin to feel the sweat building up underneath the pack. I am feeling decidedly self-conscious and I imagine people are staring at me and wondering why the fat girl is wearing a fanny pack to go running.
I get to 2.5 and notice an unopened bottle of water I hid in some bushes a few weeks ago. (I have water hidden all over the city, folks.)
I stop the clock, unholster, take a drink, reholster, start the clock. I decide I am ready to call it a day and I turn around to go home.
At exactly three miles (Garmin: “bink!”) a tightness begins to develop in my right thigh that morphs into pain within a quarter-mile. I drain the rest of the water and somehow reholster without stopping.
With an empty bottle, the belt is now as good as weightless, and the awkward gimp that was my stride is restored to something resembling “normal;” I’m suddenly off like a rocket, shaving 47 seconds (FORTY SEVEN!) off my pace between miles four and five.
Bottom line: I feel like this would be a great thing to take with you on a long hike. Maybe even just a day of sightseeing. And as Sweaty Kid so cleverly pointed out, it’s appropriately shaped to accommodate a number of cold beverages other than water (an observation I fully intend to investigate further and chronicle for a future blog post).
I guess that’s what I get for going with the cheaper model? Yet I can’t help but feel NO waist-cinching water belt would feel any more comfortable than this one.
But I still don’t like the idea of the handhelds, either. Maybe a really small one? But then, what’s the point?
To any of this.