god hates me

So yesterday I was feeling a little icky. Mainly just tired and cranky. I just wrote it off to a case of the Sundays. Then, this morning, I woke up at 3 a.m. with the congestion, itchy throat and headache characteristic of a cold.

I actually dreamed I was getting sick. In my dream, I was parched and I couldn’t breath and I desperately needed to blow my nose. I was actually sort of relieved when I woke up and all I had was a weenie little head cold.

Not ebola. Not AIDS. Just a cold.

BUT quite possibly the most poorly-timed cold OF MY ENTIRE LIFE. It’s not even worth speculation on how I might have contracted said cold. I ran Thursday, Friday and Saturday in fairly nipply conditions and then drank a lot of beer outdoors by a fire on Saturday night.

In short, I forgot to check myself before I wrecked myself.

Now, for our discussion on treatment options, I think it’s important to note I believe that echinacea is pretty much a ripoff. In my expert medical opinion, it may have some cumulative, long-term benefits, but as far as popping a couple pills after you’ve already got the ick, you might as well treat it with a regimen of rice krispy treats, for all the good it’s going to do.

That said, I’ll be taking echinacea by the fistful all week, along with some supplemental junk my husband steals from his office that is packed with astragalus, elderberry, goldenseal, vitamin C, ligustrum and zinc. And of course I’ll be loading up on the spinach/kale shakes, OJ and green tea. I may even go nuts and take some cold medicine.


13 thoughts on “god hates me

  1. I had it two weeks ago. It lasted about 6 days and then went away. It sucked, for sure!

    I used to get sick the week right before EVERY race I was supposed to run. It really pissed me off.

  2. I’ve always had good luck with those Emergen-C fizzy drink thingies. There is a 99.9% chance that they don’t so anything whatsoever to help fight off an oncoming cold, but I always credit them with my recovery. 🙂

  3. SICK! NO! WTF! This is a pain in the butt. I hope you get better ASAP.

    Based on experience I have a theory that either white wine or really astringent beer can help kill off the infection, but maybe that’s just an excuse to imbibe. I also have a lot of faith in EmergenC and tea.

  4. I forgot to say earlier that I agree with your title, because based on your tweeting skills, God does hate you. Sorry to confirm that. But so you know, Jesus loves you. Jesus is God so it’s complicated but trust me on this one.

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