So I thought I’d rip them off and have a little fun of my own.
Last night I drank Hoppin’ Frog’s Hop Dam Triple IPA (10%ABV/OMGLOTSANDLOTSOFHOPS), and had an epiphany. Of sorts. As the title suggests, I went out of my way to draw a virtually nonexistent parallel between this beer and the classic film Christmas Vacation, so I could do a blog about it.
But I think you’ll still be mesmerized.
Clark drives his family into the heart of the Rockies (which is funny since they live in a suburb of Chicago) to find that most meaningful of Christmas symbols, the Christmas tree. They sing Christmas carols.
I drive 15 minutes to Kahn’s Fine Wine and Spirits to stock up on booze for the holidays. I sing heavy metal.
Clark sees a beautiful aura shining down on one very special tree.
I see a triple IPA with a frog on it.
Clark’s snobby neighbor asks him where he thinks he’s going to put a tree that big.
Liquor store cashier judges me with her eyeballs and tells me to be careful.
Clark cuts the twine, and branches explode all over the living room.
I crack open the beer and an overwhelming flavor of piney hoppy goodness socks me in the mouth.
Clark goes to bed with sticky fingers.
I commit the blog equivalent of drunk dialing by asking the Vegan Anti-Hero where the hell she’s been all my life.
Did I go to as much trouble as Clark did to make this the best Christmas ever? No.
Are Clark and I soul mates? Maybe.