quick guide to common personality flaws

In yoga last night, our instructor (or is there some special term for that person? Practitioner? Yogi?) told us during our special meditation time to think about diversity and how everyone is special in their own way, yet we all have the same wants, needs and desires; and we are all connected.

It made me want to reconsider some of the harsh judgments I often make about people.


But it is important to understand why people act the way they do, so here’s the breakdown.*

Flaw #1: Self-absorption

The cause: Low self-esteem. In the same way that small men drive around in big trucks, people who talk about themselves all the time are trying to compensate. Deep down inside, they are sad, sad little velveteen rabbits crying out for somebody to love them enough to turn them into real bunnies. Of course, no one will ever truly love these people because they are horrible to be around.

Flaw #2: Unbridled enthusiasm

The cause: Bipolar disorder. People who seem blissfully happy all the time are on medication. Or, they are off their medication and it’s just a matter of time before they go manic.

Flaw #3: Newlyweds (related: the engaged; new moms)

The cause: The delusion that somehow they are the only ones on earth to get married, ever. There’s no cure for newlyweds except time; simply avoid these people as much as possible. (Bonus PSA: keep in mind if you’re focusing wholly on the reception rather than the vows, there’s a good chance your marriage won’t last.)

Flaw #4: Childish behavior

The cause: These people were unfairly robbed of their childhood. They feel compelled to act foolish and needy in order to make up for lost time. Symptoms include pretending to still like children’s books, movies, toys and clothing. It’s incredibly annoying, but keep in mind these people were likely locked in closets or basements for the majority of their formative years, so you might want to cut them some slack.

Flaw #5: Food blogger

The cause: Eating disorder.

Flaw #6: Uncontrollable rage

The cause: You, probably. There’s nothing wrong with us. It’s your fault somehow and you should probably try a little harder to understand what we’re going through. We’re all connected, remember?


*I’m not an analyst or therapist or analrapist. I failed freshman psych. If you take anything I say seriously, the joke’s on you.


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