portrait of a chick flick + friday haiku

I swear I’m not intentionally trying to be contrary…I really just don’t get chick flicks.

Because why? They’re predictable and unrealistic and they make both women and men look stupid. And if you’re going to go that route, you at least need to throw in some raunchy sex and some killing.

See here:

“Oh, hey, I’m a guy and I like to do guy things!”

“I’m a single girl living in the city. I like sports and you probably aren’t accustomed to that since I’m a girl. I write for a magazine and/or I have no discernible income and still manage to buy things and have a great apartment.”

“We have nothing in common and I’m kind of a dick!”

“I’m carefree and independent but deep down I’m longing to fulfill what I believe is my sole purpose as a woman: babies.”

“I want to have sex with your slutty friend!”

A chance encounter leads to casual sex and quick develops into something marginally more meaningful. The guy’s quirky roommate and the girl’s slutty friend provide intermittent comic relief. An innocent misunderstanding is compounded into a major incident. Somehow it’s resolved. We’re in love. The End!

And, your Friday haiku.

Hey, we’re both shallow
and insanely good-looking.
We should get married.


16 thoughts on “portrait of a chick flick + friday haiku

  1. Sounds like somebody should be writing screenplays! The chick flick concept hasn’t been beaten to death just yet. MOAR GIRL BOY DRAMZ = LOVE

  2. Cut to a shot of the happy couple in the midst of their “you may now kiss the bride!” moment before rolling the credits.

    Yeah, the whole genre is entirely formulaic. Yawn.

  3. You wrapped it up so well.

    For some reason, I keep trying to like chick flicks. And will continue to rent them- only to end up rolling my eyes. Guess I’m too independent and into sports to get it? Oh well… back to my freelance article I’m working on for a top fashion magazine…

  4. This isn’t a defense of the formulaic nature of these films, but they’re no more so than testosterone flicks of the Die Hard/Rambo/Lethal Weapon “variety,” and at least you can fall asleep during them because there’s not gratuitous gunfire every 47 seconds. An”d I kind of liked Singles; I may be shallow/but Bridget Fonda’s cuter/than Mel Gibson’s ass.

    I also can’t suspend disbelief when it comes to the perpetual layabout ways of people in movies and TV shows who are supposedly employed or live in high-rent parts of New York despite working at coffee or sandwich shops. One reason I loved Seinfeld so much is that the writers had the sense to work this theme actively into the plot (Kramer’s mysterious wealth, George living with his parents between jobs).

  5. You forgot the clash where they’re unsure if their fledgling relationship will survive.

    Last few chick flicks/romantic comedies I’ve watched have been awful. (These were all torrent downloads so I’m voting with my feet or something.)

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