what I’m not writing

A blog post about the running I’ve been doing. I have been running, I just haven’t written about it. I’ve done some run-walks, some intervals, some 2 and 3 milers in gale-force winds. I even thought about registering for a 5k until I started thinking about the logistics and got a headache.

A blog post about the beer I’ve been drinking. I split a 2010 Dark Lord with the hubhubhubbykins a while back. It was delicious, I drank it way too fast, got drunk, and realized that was all I had to say about that.

One for my baby’s 3-month birthday. I have lots of things to share about my baby. Mostly things involving over-priced baby toys and diarrhea. But I just haven’t had time to organize all of them into a coherent blog post. Right now, it’s just a bunch of disjointed paragraphs and a lot of photos. Oh, but not of diarrhea.

One about how if you put cayenne peppers in the freezer, at some point (last Thursday) they will reach an apex of hotness and become nuclear. There may have been diarrhea in this imaginary post as well.

One about how to monetize your baby. I think this is self-explanatory.

One about books I haven’t been reading. (Teaser: I thought I was cool enough to pick up Milton’s Paradise Lost after three months of not sleeping. I got about three lines in before it gave me a headache and I had to switch it out for a book with reinforced pages and lots of pictures of baby animals.)

A whole blog post about how I’ve nicknamed my left boob “Old Faithful” and my right boob “Warren.” Hey, I never promised you brilliance, people.

But you don’t get to read ANY of these blog posts because I just can’t get my shit together. So can you guys just please look at the baby? And I’ll be back shortly.

 

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16 thoughts on “what I’m not writing

  1. I will gladly look at the baby! But not in a creepy way. In a my-maternal-instints-and-biological-clock-are-making-my-ovaries-ache way. Although all this diarrhea talk helps quiet the uterine area….I can’t control my own digestive system, let alone someone else’s.

    • would you believe I don’t even mine the diarrhea any more? It doesn’t even smell bad (yet). The biggest struggle is trying to come up with fun things to do when its 30 degrees outside with a small person who can’t even sit up on her own yet. Who has an attention span of 15 minutes.

    • We’ll be back in Chicago in June, I need to go drinking with you again! And/or running. But preferably drinking since it will be June in Chicago.

    • YOU ARE SO CLOSE! Hang in there! You will be running and drinking again in no time. And by “running and drinking” I mean “crying and cleaning up diarrhea.” =P

    • Ha! I do. During the very first bath we gave her, she shat on me. I don’t blame her, warm water does that to me too sometimes. We actually have it on video.

  2. Damnit. That picture actually makes me feel a little warm and tingly. There are way too many people around me right now who have either just given birth or who are about to. It’s making my maternal instinct feel like it’s not just a myth.

    Goddammit she’s cute.

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