I ran my fastest 10k ever today, in 54:20, in three loops around the tw0-mile fitness trail at the YMCA with my cell phone and keys jangling around in my pocket, just like the elites.
I celebrated with a Bacon Maple ale, a collaborative effort by Rogue and Voodoo Doughnut that I fully expected to be revolting but bought anyway because it’s been a long time since I drank a novelty beer and because fuck you, that’s why.
It tastes suspiciously like drinking a campfire after you’ve just had waffles. Really, really smokey with a sticky sweet maple syrup finish that made me feel like sipping it was going to make my lips greasy.
It’s either 6.5% or 5.6% ABV, either of which in my opinion is not enough ABVs by far. If you’re going to make a bacon beer, you need to make it be at least, at least an 8%. Preferably more like 18%. I feel like this needed to burn on the way down and it did not.
I also felt…full after. But not in the satisfying way. I felt full in the way that you feel full when you want a really good meal but you’re so hungry you just don’t care, so you go to IHOP and then you hate yourself.
Bottom line: if you’re curious what a bacon maple beer tastes like and if you respect the other works of Rogue, and yeah, if you like doughnuts, go ahead and pick one up. But if it’s an adult beverage you’re after, you’re better off pouring this over ice, adding a couple fingers of Johnny Walker Black and topping it off with Navan. And it would be called a Johnny Brown Hog.