Valentines Haiku Part Deux

I gave my lover
a severed head. He helped me
bury the body.

Nothing says romance
like a bottle of scotch and
a handful of pills.

Nothing says I have
no idea who you are, like
Valentines jewelry.

I’ll do you while you
do the dog while he does the
kid. Aristocrats!

This year love, instead
of you blowing me a kiss,
just smile and blow me.

It puts the lotion
on its skin, or else it gets
the hose again. YAY.

This year, I reserved
a spot for you in back of
my windowless van.

Dripping candles and
dripping pus. A Valentines
STD for us!

heman

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3 thoughts on “Valentines Haiku Part Deux

  1. We have toys like that. If I sent you some images, would you pen some more poetry in between your crafting projects involving pink tulle? I’m bothered by the fact that the last one rhymes. Deeply and profoundly bothered. Gotta go find some lube…

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