I had a rough night, you guys!
Toddler wouldn’t go to bed until 10:30 and the baby was up every 90 minutes. My kids totally WRECKED me. But I won’t get into it today because I don’t want to think about it and you certainly don’t want to read about it. THE SHOW MUST GO ON.
So, I used to think I was really unique and clever for having this thing against clowns. I read Stephen King’s IT and now I hate clowns, I’m the specialest snowflake ever!
But it turns out everyone hates clowns!
And I blame the media. Because it’s easier to blame the media than to accept personal responsibility!
So without any more blather, here are, as noted in the title, the top 10 iconic shitty clowns of my generation.
Homey D. Clown. He represents an important period in American clown culture, as no other clown at that time beat people with a sock full of tennis balls.
Herschel Shmoikel Pinchas Yerucham Krustofsky, of chain-smoking, cocaine-addicted fame.
Pennywise. The only thing scarier than Tim Curry in drag.
The Poltergeist clown. The only thing scarier than Zelda Rubinstein.
And the parody from Scary Movie 2 is also pretty shitty.
That drunk clown from Uncle Buck.
That not-dead clown from Billy Madison. He was actually a very nice clown who was just really down on his luck.
Captain Spaulding. A smart-ass dirty pervert serial killer clown. Only the mind of Rob Zombie could dream up something so terrible.
Frankie. Not evil, but still very much Gary Busey.
And the #1 SHITTY CLOWN OF ALL TIME, Clowny clown clown.
And also, because it came up in my search, this Craigslist ad from 2008.
Clowns, am I right?
(I’m doing a challenge where I’m blogging a scary thing a day until Halloween, and also trying to read more. If you want to read this entire mess of a series, start here!)