survey funsies + post-holiday stupor

Jesus Christ, amirite?

I totally meant to write a blog post before Christmas but then the fams all came in town and now all of a sudden it’s December 28 29.

Here are a few of our best moments, though…

BEER!

We gave her psychedelics for Christmas.

Oh, and a bike.

ALL I GOT WAS THIS DAMN WOODEN CHEW TOY.

So anyway I got tagged in one of those survey/questionnaire blog post thingies the other day (or like, two weeks ago) by Elle who writes a delightful running blog called A Fast Paced Life. She is bright, funny, pretty, and faster than me, so naturally I hate her guts. KIDDING. She passed the award on to me and since I really like to tell people things about myself, I was thrilled.

1) What is my current health related goal?

Health is overrated. I want to drink more whisky.

2) What is my biggest irrational fear?

I’ll be serious for a moment: something bad happening to one of my children. If I read or think too much about the horrible things that happen to children, it gives me anxiety.

3) Do I enjoy wrapping presents?

Fuck no. I suck at it. My husband is better at wrapping presents than I am. Shit, my CAT is better at wrapping presents than I am. I really should have published this post before Christmas.

Look at how I wrapped the shit out of this nothing I got you.

4) What is my favorite cross training activity?

I’ll answer this one with a GIF.

5) If you came to visit me, what would we do?

I’d take you here and get you drunk and then we’d go some place where it is inappropriate to be drunk, like the Vonnegut Library or the Children’s Museum.

6) I have two weeks off work and two round trip plane tickets to anywhere. Where would I go and who would I take?

Somewhere remote where I could be all by myself and sleep, uninterrupted for the whole two weeks. And I would use the extra seat for my gigantic mommy martyr complex.

7) What’s the most embarrassing thing to happen to me during a run or a race? 

I can’t remember anything that awful, but I used to always have to pee during high school cross country races. Sorry, that’s pretty boring. Maybe if I ran a little harder…

8) Three best days of my life? Or at least the top three that come to mind.

The last day of work when you quit a job is always a fun day, isn’t it?

Watching my daughter ride a bike the other day was pretty awesome. The day I found out I was pregnant, and the other day I found out I was pregnant. The days my kids were born. The day I ran that trail half-marathon I did. The day AFTER our wedding when we left for the honeymoon (except for the hangover).

9) Okay, so I HAVE to eat a fast food meal. Which restaurant would I choose and what do I order? 

I eat fast food all the time without anyone holding a gun to my head, but for the purposes of this question, Arby’s beef ‘n’ cheddar with curly fries.

10) Have I ever met a celebrity?

I shared a high school science class with Freddie Prinze, Jr. NPH went to my high school too, but he graduated the year before I went there, so I guess that doesn’t count. I met Steve Earle once, very briefly (brother of a friend of a friend). I hung out with a few of the members of Divine Heresy, circa 2008. Oh! Wilford Brimley. I probably should have listed him first.

“Famous people are just more interesting.”

11) Share a pic of myself in non-workout clothes. 

Here’s me with two of my besties. Obviously this was taken a long, long time ago when I could drink during the day.

I’m the dick who didn’t put her beer down for the photo.

12) If I could choose to have a “do over” and switch careers, what would I choose and why?

Whatever job pays the most money for the least amount of work.

13) If I won an Olympic Gold Medal, how do I think I would react? 

Obviously I would be pissed that I didn’t win 19 Olympic gold medals.

14) What do I want for Christmas? 

I like how Elle answered this so I’m going to leave it here for you: “Assuming that this question is about something selfishly personal, rather than being a do-gooder (if it’s the latter, I want justice and fairness in this world), I would love to experience the tasting menu at Per Se.”

And my answer (second to justice and fairness of course) would be lots of sleep for my whole family. I got a Keurig and some tights though, so at least I will be smoking hot and caffeinated.

15) What skill do I lack?

Common sense. The ability to not say all the inappropriate things I am thinking. The ability to not respond to idiot comments and postings on the internet. I’m lazy. I can’t stop cursing. I spend too much time on the internet. Now I’m just naming all my defects. Focus.

Passing on the award to…

Reasonably Suspicious

Cindy

Sonia

Milfy

Oh, you can probably sub in questions that don’t pertain to Christmas. Just make something up.